I remember as a child my mum would always tell me that my pretty dress or the expensive biscuits were for a special occasion. Even now I hear her telling her grandchildren the same thing, in fact even my sister tells her kids that certain outfits are for a special day!

By the time I was in my early 20s I still believed in special occasions, looking at my pretty dresses or fabulous shoes, eagerly awaiting that big day. By the time I was in my late 20s, I was thoroughly confused by what constituted a special day or occasion. Was it my best friend’s wedding? But then I had to wear her choice of bridesmaid dress and shoes), a date with the one who could possibly be the one? But how would I know on the first date, and wouldn’t that just be a waste of the outfit if he wasn’t ‘the one’? For a job interview? But then fabulous shoes might not send out the appropriate message? A night out with my inner circle after months of not seeing each other? But would that really necessitate my favourite and very expensive clutch, after all, they’ve just my bffs?

Determining a special occasion was a lot harder than I thought, and rather than ask my mum what she meant by this mythical occasion, I realised that this is something we do with life. We’ve always waiting for something. Waiting to do what we really want to do until it’s the right moment, or with the right person, or have the right outfit, or whatever. We put our lives on hold until we think the right time has come.

But when you have lost as many people as I have lost, you realise that the right time and that special occasion is now. Every day we wake up alive is a special occasion, and an opportunity to be fabulous and do what makes us happy. As Nicki Minaj/Drake said, everybody dies but not everybody lives.

So I’ve certainly stopped holding my breathe waiting for the right time, I’m exhaling right now and stepping out in the fabulous shoes – even if I’m only going round the corner to the shops, because life is too short to wait for that special occasion!